When I was living in Namibia, a friend who was super cool grew her body hair and didn't shave and she was great. She was au naturel and I wanted to be just like her.
So I came back to England in winter and decided to be au naturel and cool. I had not thought about the fact that my friend was being au naturel in summer in Namibia. Because it was winter, I was wearing tights and leggings a lot. Tight things on your legs when your legs are waaaaaay hairy is itchy in the extreme! I was constantly shifting and fidgeting with my tights, itching and scratching. I started to get little red rashy bits where the hair had been pressed into a pair of tights at the wrong angle.
The armpits. Well, the armpits were a constant problem. I get hot much quicker than I get cold, anyway. So even though it was winter, I'd be sweating up a storm under my jumper. I was constantly showering to stop from getting too stinky.
It was all very awkward and complicated. Lots of itching and sweating. NOT what I'd signed up for! Why wasn't I the picture of au naturel and coolness? Why weren't girls looking at me and thinking how admirable it was that I was being true to my body and its natural form? But no, I was the sweaty itchy kid in the corner with leg rashes who dreamed of taking a razor to it all....
Eventually, I did it. I just did it. It felt great! I was smooth and fuss-free and happy.
So I'm sorry, world. I tried.
I tried. And I failed.
And now I swim. So there is no way I can be mega hairy and preparing for Brazil 2016. Everyone knows you need to be streamlined so you can go faster. Unfortunately that's what it comes down to. So I have to follow my Olympic dreams and that's just how it's got to be. Alright?
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